Mind, Stop Talking to Me, I Can’t Hear the Person I’m Talking To

The mind is a wonderful place…sometimes.  Our behaviors can be triggered by such subtle things that in turn, affect our emotions, judgments and even our reactions. 

I find, that often, as adults, we comply or resist, depending on what is in it for us personally. This assessment is done on such a subtle level and at such warp speed, that it rarely gets questioned or challenged. Yet when definitive statements are made or directives are given, we might suddenly react, rather than respond. We take the statement or directive as a personal affront instead of as a statement to consider.

Our mind is there to protect us. It is built to do so, just ask the paleomammalian or neomammalian brain within. It will tell us when we are being undermined (we don’t want our authority questioned).  It will inform us when we don’t want to engage (this statement I just heard sounds like a challenge). It will tell us when we feel threatened (we don’t want to appear indecisive) etc., etc., etc.

In this COVID-19 abrupt, immediate and for some, extreme changes in day to day life, the need to shelter has led to frustration and aggressive based communication (both verbal and physical, both overt and covert). As you listen to local, state, and federal officials regarding COVID-19 directives, or as you interact with those you are living very closely with right now, use these techniques to become more aware of your response and begin to change how you respond.

Ask yourself if you are reacting to a comment or statement being made. You’ll most likely experience this behavior by having an immediate “reaction” to the comment or statement.  

Next, inquire within, as to what the trigger was that made you react. Then ask yourself, what did this trigger threaten in you in ways that threatened your beliefs, Know your beliefs and values so you can identify what in you can be threatened.  

Of course, it is important to be our best selves. But defending our positions is not what relationship is about. Relationship needs compassion, listening, understanding, and appropriate allowance.

Don’t let your mind overtake your intentions with those you are close to, in this COVID-19 environment. The mind may want you to do what you want, while in society and relationship, the mind has to acquiesce to another presence. This is the environment to understand how to do so (be in relationship) in ways that enhance ourselves and each other. Doing so may be more complex than the effort we had previously been giving it.

So, excuse me mind but I need to say this to you:  Mind, Stop Talking to Me, I Can’t Hear the Person I’m Talking To.